When The Weekend Brings Your Worst Fears And The Best News (how to hold on to hope)

The call came in twice.

By the time Friday evening arrives, I am ready for my phone to be silenced and all social media to stay hushed under the closed lid of my lap top.

Answering the second call changed all of the elaborate notions I had for myself and the weekend. And my worst fear was on the other end of the line.  A frantic cry and words that still press on my heart like a vice.  My heart will never beat the same again.  But neither will my brothers.

His heart had stopped.

He was with his family, and they pulled and prayed and cried and rushed him to the hospital. 12-15 minutes without oxygen.

And their world was spinning out of control and it will never sit just the same on its axis again.

Our weekend turned into our worst fears ever. Watching and waiting for life.

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How many weekends have I toiled the time away with thoughts of how routine and predictable life can be when the school books are put away, and the chores, the weekend stops and starts run together.  And when Sunday arrives, I always wish for Monday to be another day of rest.  Just one more?  And the little bit of weekends we have seem so short.

Until I am sitting beside the man that grew up as one of my closest friends, watching his breaths and waiting for a sign of life. Any sign.

And now the weekend watch was long.  No more wishing for another day to prolong the sitting.

Now I was praying for life.  A new Monday and a new word of promise.  I was afraid.  How can a world change so quickly?

It was my worst dream.  A week of vigil at my brother’s bedside.  My sister in law and I with our heads together on his white sterile sheet as we rub his hands to wait for some thing.  Any thing.  Please Lord.

No pulse, no oxygen, a blockage in the heart and now a hypothermic state, and we wonder if our lives will ever be the same again.

Will his life ever be the same again?

Hope.

Whispers through the dark, curtains pulled.  My siblings and I holding hands, tears on shoulders, all while our Maker watches and heals.

I was afraid.  This space in time where I was having trouble connecting my faith and my words.

Miraculously God uses the time as we pace, pray and plead.  He makes all things whole.

And while my brother heals under the wings of Jesus, and we watch and wait… He works a miracle.  Right before our eyes.

Will I ever look at the weekend the same again?  How God can turn something so short into something so long – But time has no hold on God.

Hanging on the very next breath ushered us into the day my brother opened his eyes.  It was a slow blink and time was ushered away.

He reached for my hand and mouthed the words, “I love you Sep.” No voice, just movement of his lips.

My faith was shaken in that moment.  It was a like a fire to my soul. No matter how many words of doubt, assailing tears and drama that unfolds in the waiting room of the ICU, I saw the power of God rise and shine up and over my brother’s life.

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And when fiery darts of doubt come my way, I will always remember the moment my faith was put to shame.  On the Cross.  And all my fears fled away.

And the week of days watching and waiting slipped into eternity and his breath was deeper and his life was re-started.  Never the same, lost on time, and given a new outlook on all that we have.

One breath.  One Hope.  One Life.  The best news ever.

A weekend restart.  Holding on to Hope.

 

A Common Core To Any Education (misconceptions about teaching your children)

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Everyone needs to homeschool their children.  False. All children are able to learn the same way.  False. All students should be expected to test out at their grade level according to their age.  False. You will agree with everything written … [Continue reading]

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With a deliberate steady push to the radio dial, I turned the noon report off. We keep current.  We allow our children to know of the world affairs and the local news.  But, with one gentle silence to the news anchor's voice, I bring the whole … [Continue reading]

Pumpkin Cake Delicious

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Give Your Child Every Thing They Want (and the world will lose the gift of gratitude)

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Straight up from the toaster and onto the delicate plate.  Two slices of bread, buttered to the edges and sprinkled with cinnamon and sugar.  An even dusting across the top and then neatly stacked to line up the edges.  This is where we would get … [Continue reading]

Because You’re The Mom Who Just Needs A Little Space (Monday at its finest)

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We are like velcro.  We were born with it as young girls, and we become more sticky as we grow.  And as we move into motherhood, the velcro grows into our skin and we become a part of it. Sometimes not even realizing that we are attached at the … [Continue reading]

A Fall Favorite – Chicken Barley Chili

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Simple ingredients, healthy, easy  and perfect for your family  -  for a cool fall evening. Try our family favorite Chicken Barley Chili: … [Continue reading]

Comfort Food At Its Finest ( Baked Oatmeal For Any Time of the Day)

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It is so yummy,,,, and it was so much fun sharing with you. I just popped some on the oven! … [Continue reading]