I waited. I waited for a long time, after I was married for my husband to “get it right.”
I was waiting for Him to pray daily with me. I waited for him to rally our little family around and have daily devotions with us. I waited for Him to lead.
He was able to have his own time in the Word – Why couldn’t he just take a little time with us?
A long time – I brewed with frustration, dis-contentment, and down-right confusion as to why this man who I married wasn’t leading our new family in the way of righteousness.
We went to church. We talked of spiritual matters. We even led our children to Christ, and answered all of their questions about God’s Word.
But, it just wasn’t “good enough.” ( for me.)
And then, my constant nagging, and perpetual sighs – led to a little self-triumph when my husband began his attempt at Daily devotions with our family.
You would think that I would be praising the Lord, and encouraging my husband. I should have been.
His efforts were met with my ideas to improve, or to read to the children in a way that they would understand.
I would interject my thoughts in the middle of His talking to the children about a passage he had chosen, or re-tell the story in more candid way.
And still, my dis-contentment at what I perceived to be a “lack of godly leadership,” grew roots.
I brewed over thoughts like:
“I thought this man I married grew up in a Christian home.. WHY isn’t he able to lead us in the Word daily?”
“Why Can’t My Husband JUST get it right?”
I know this sounds so ugly. It was. It was wrong.. but when we compare our spiritual lives to our expectations - God is left out.
This was 20 years ago.
Today, this is not our life.
What is different?
Shortly after begging God to open my husbands eyes – Well, God opened mine.
I was in sin. I was angry, and self-righteous, and I wasn’t taking up my own responsibility in the area of teaching the truths to my children.
And this is what happened -
A great zeal grew within me to train and teach my children in God’s Word – Daily. It became a wonderful beginning of memories with all of my children even to this very day.
So, what about my husband? He saw the joy, the children learning and growing, singing verses, songs, and memorizing Scripture.
He saw heart change in them and me. He was learning too. A new habit isn’t easy. It takes work and desire. He did love the Lord – He was just exercising this new habit – with a family.
And we grew together. With no ropes, expectations or cynical attitudes.
He began to pick up the Word himself more and more, and the desire to lead his family in The Way, The Truth and The Life – Came from the Holy Spirit and not the constant nagging and expectations of his wife.
Where did I go wrong? I am not the Holy Spirit.
I hear from so many moms, that they “just wish,” their spouse would lead them in Bible Devotions daily, or even lead in the areas that they see their husbands are sorely lacking.
Have you ever felt this way?
I guess I will ask you the very words I finally stopped and asked myself – “What are you waiting for?” Our growth is Christ is not about what someone else is giving us, or waiting to be led. We are accountable to God.
God’s Word can be taught, and integrated into so many moments of your day. It can be handed to them with smiles, joy, and when they are least expecting it… and from their mom.
The amazing journey of claiming responsibility for the moral truths and training their hearts.. and sticking to it will be the largest memory maker and life-habit you could instill in your children now and forever.
This is the beginning of a small series - How Does A Mom Find Time To Have Devotions With Her Children – Daily…
Ideas, resources, and encouragement will come your way. Join me in this constant journey of “getting it right.”
Where we focus on what WE are giving our children.
Maybe you are in this spot that I was many years ago?
Don’t let it eat at you – these emotions, thoughts and ideas – - We are to be looking at our heart.
Because our Children certainly are.
How are your family devotions going? Are you waiting for them to start?